Thursday, July 30, 2009
Today has not been a great day.
For you to follow, I'm going to need to tell you about my last couple of days...
Monday morning started off like any other day. I begrudgingly awoke to the sound of my alarm clock and got the children ready to take Ansley to school. I have no idea what set me off, but tears would not stop their flow as I drove to drop Ansley off for the day.
As I arrived back home, my elderly neighbor from across the way practically chased me down my driveway to talk to me. I did not feel like being sociable in the least. I wanted to take Eli inside the house so we could hide away from the rest of the world until I absolutely had to leave the house again to pick Ansley back up. No such luck.
D had a little black puppy following her as she made her way up my drive way. She said the puppy had been up at her house since that Friday, and wanted to know if he belonged to us. I promptly informed her that "No, he was not ours, and that we didn't need anymore pets."
She continues to chat, and finally remembers that I was expecting a baby and asks if he is in the car... Ouch. I really didn't want to have to go into that story today.
I explained to her what happened and she replied,"Oh, I hate that, but at least since he was a baby, you know he's at rest, he's probably better off..." Yes, thank you, but that still doesn't take away the hurt!
We talked a little more, and as she started to walk away (without the puppy) I asked her if she was going to take the dog back with her. "I suppose he'll follow me back if he wants to", was her reply as she continues to disappear down my driveway. The puppy stayed with me. Great!
To be honest, I really didn't pay the puppy any attention. I didn't want another dog, and I figured he would just run along back to D's house since she had been feeding him. Nope. When I went back outside to feed the other dogs, he was still there.
I caved. I sat down on the steps to pet the puppy and he just climbed up into my lap. I swear my heart melted. It was so nice to have something need me. To have something I could hold in my arms. This puppy needed me, but really, I think I needed him. I needed to be needed.
After I got Joseph warmed up to the idea of keeping the dog, we decided to name him Patton. We went to the store and got him some flea shampoo and puppy food and decided we were going to keep him as an inside dog, as he was doing superior with "puppy training"...
I have to tell you, this puppy has completely won my heart over.
But here's my problem.
Patton has progressively gotten very sick today. After a couple of phone calls, we determined his diagnosis to be Parvo. And he's got it bad. We don't know if he is going to live. I am feeding him liquids every 30 minutes through a syringe because he won't eat or drink, and I'm trying desperately to keep him hydrated. He's not keeping anything down.
I called my grandmother today and told her what was going on, and boy did she get an ear full! I mean really, can I please catch a break here? I'm really trying not to throw my own little pity party here, but this just opens up a lot of very fresh wounds.
I have this puppy here, that I have completely fallen in love with...
I have no idea if he is going to live or die, but I do know that realistically his outcome is looking very grim...
And you may be asking why I haven't taken him to the vet?... Because two weeks ago, you may remember my post about our chocolate lab, Colonel, being hit by a car, which completely cleaned out our bank account... We just don't have the money.
So here I am... Back to trying to mentally prepare myself for the worst, while trying to be hopeful.
I promise I'm not comparing Wyatt to a dog, but my heart just was not ready to handle this... Patton just has to be alright. I can't handle losing another piece of my heart right now... the piece that Wyatt took with him is still pretty much gaping. I would really prefer not to add salt to injury.