Calling All Prayer Warriors

I have a friend who needs your prayers. Kimberly from Happily Henninger is 10 weeks pregnant and is living through a bit of a scare right now. I'll let her explain in her words...

"We are having to visit a perinatal specialist tomorrow for a second opinion of something Dr. Odom saw on the ultrasound. In the brain area he saw a little "halo" type shape where the brain was forming and thinks it might be a cystic hygroma. This is were fluid is trapped in the neck and cannot get out and causes lumps to form. The spinal area looked great, but it was just the halo around the brain that he is concerned about from the ultrasounds. There are a few different things that can happen here (coming from the Dr.). This can go away by itself or it could be a chromosomal dysfunction. A typical abnormality is Turner's syndrome."

This sweet woman has already experienced the loss of her baby boy Hudson. Please pray that there isn't anything to worry about and that her baby is perfectly healthy. She will be keeping us updated. Go to her blog for updates or to just leave words of encouragement.

I Love Fall

Forgetting about holidays and all the hurt they dredge up for a minute, I LOVE fall! I Love, love, L-O-V-E it. It has to be my favorite time of year, and I've grown even more fond of it since moving to Tennessee. The leaves are just beautiful. It's cool and crisp outside... perfect for sweaters but not so cold any of your extremities go numb. How wonderful to breath in the beauty of fall!

And that's what my family has been doing... soaking up the last of the vibrant leaves before winter sneaks them away.

And of course, big sister makes sure Wyatt is a part of all the fun as well!

We've also been spending time with old friends...

Experiencing new and Exciting firsts...

Finding time to snuggle...

And being to darn cute for our own good...

And we can't forget to stop and smell (and admire) the beautiful roses!

So now you know what we've been up to!

New "Real" Friends

As promised yesterday, here is one of my "soon to come happier posts".

Last week I had the privilege to meet Traci and her family. They live in New York, but came to my neck of the woods to visit family for Thanksgiving. It was so wonderful to meet her beautiful family...

If you've never been over to Traci's blog you would have no idea what a miracle it was for me to meet this little boy...

Can you believe doctors said he would not survive long after birth? Can you believe Traci was advised to terminate her pregnancy with him? You can read about that here. All I have to say is that God does answer with a Yes sometimes when you ask for healing. It was nice to be able to hug on a true miracle. What a great reminder of the awesome wonder our God is capable of...

Of course, Riley is absolutely precious as well!

Eli and Carson hung out together, while we all chased Ansley and Riley around the playground. Everyone became fast friends.

It's still amazing to me how complete strangers can meet and feel like they've known each other for years. Thank you Traci for taking time on your Vacation to come out and meet me.

Just Call Me Scrooge

This is my preemptive strike before I answer my door and am greeted by search parties looking for me! I've gotten quite a few messages from my dear bloggy friends who are worried about my lack of posting...

Sorry to worry anyone, I'm fine...

I've just been having a really hard time with the holidays. Everything just seems so wrong to me. I keep waiting for the ghost of Christmas Past to show up any minute and whisk me away. In truth, I wish he would. I'd give anything to relive ANY part of my life where Wyatt was still tangibly here instead of merely being tucked away within the fibers of my heart.

Do you know Wyatt would be six months old today? Half a year... just yesterday... an eternity ago...

On Thanksgiving, all I could think about was the long list of things I had to give thanks for. It's an unbelievably long list... but Wyatt not being here casts a dark shadow on my list and sucks the joy away from me.

I actually did okay on Thanksgiving. That is until I called my father. It was nothing he said, but my cousin answered the phone... She has a baby girl who is just a little older than what Wyatt would be and I was forced (okay, I could have hung up) to listen as she cooed about how much her baby girl enjoyed her first Thanksgiving. I got all the details of how she dug into to her mashed potatoes and I even sat through my cousin putting the phone up to A's mouth so I could hear as she started blowing raspberries... It probably doesn't seem so terrible, but you might as well of light my heart on fire.

And now, Christmas is upon us. I don't even have my tree up yet. I'm battling with my scrooge mood of "What's the point? Who needs to put a tree up anyways?" to feeling guilty that I haven't put one up so I can add Wyatt's ornaments to the tree. It feels like the only way he'll be able to actually be a tangible part of our family during Christmas. I swear, I have an uncanny ability to overanalyze things and make my life so much more difficult than they need to be. I just miss Wyatt so much!

Joseph asked me the other day, what I wanted for Christmas. I keep telling him there isn't anything I want that he can give me. Nobody can give what I really want. I just want my baby back. I'm not even asking to have Wyatt back indefinitely... Another two minutes would do me just fine. Just to feel the weight of him in my arms and the warmth from his body...

Wow, this post isn't depressing at all! Can you see why I've stayed away? Not like the holidays aren't hard enough without dragging all my friends down with me :)

I do have other happier post I want to share with you, but tonight, I'm missing my son. I will be doing more posts in the near future. I just wanted to let everyone know what was going on with me and let you know that I still love all of you very much and look forward to sharing more with you soon.

Once upon a time

Once upon a time

there lived a girl whose heart was whole.

She sang and laughed her way through life...

A sweet naivety filled her soul.

Even unto womanhood,

the worlds perception remained kind.

Pain and hurt from all around

evaded her narrow mind...

Until one day it happened...

Her world was torn apart.

This woman learned what it really meant,

to truly give her heart.

She thought that she had done it,

the day she said “I do”.

Or surely when she welcomed

baby one and baby two.

But laying on a table

hearing “incompatible with life”

Baby three won’t join your family,

as you had hoped he might.

The world became scary,

full of uncertainty and grief.

She gave her heart completely

knowing time would be her thief.

The day arrived to say hello

to a sweet soul passing through.

What a blessing through her heartache

to say “Son, we both love you”.

As good-bye was being uttered,

she slipped her son her heart.

He gave to her his memories

and now they will never be apart.

Each holds a piece

of what the other had to give.

He has my heart,

and for his memory I will live.

I love you Wyatt and miss you more than words!

Love,

Mommy

Doors flying open

Guess what happened yesterday?

I opened a message in my inbox titled " Regarding your fight for Wyatt", from a woman I'd never heard from before. The message I contained read as follows:

"My name is B.W. and I live in SE Tennessee. I saw your plight through a message board called Hannah's Prayer. I have a very dear friend in the TN House. I fowarded your story to him. His name is Richard Floyd. I've copied his note back to me below. Please contact him. I know he would be willing to do whatever he can to help y'all out. He is a wonderful Christian man. My heart goes out to your family as you grieve the loss of your little one. Sincerely in Christ, B.W."

Apparently, someone, somewhere was talking about my sweet Wyatt and it happened to catch this woman's eyes!

And to make matters even more wonderful, Representative Floyd e-mailed B back and she forwarded his message to me which read:

"I would be pleased and honored to do anything I could to assist these dear people.They can contact me 24/7 at :

(I took the numbers out because I believe they are his personal numbers and I would want permission before posting) I know both Richard (Representative Montgomery) and Doug (Senator Overbey) very well and certainly be honored to join them in sponsoring a bill to effect the desired change. Blessings Richard Philippians4:13"

Can you believe it! Keep doing your work Lord!

I guess I shouldn't have been surprised when I called one of the numbers given to me and immediately got Representative Floyd personally! We talked for a while, I got to tell him all about Wyatt, and he will be rallying support for me to get this legislation changed! He said he has A LOT of friends whom he KNOWS will support the change. Session officially starts back on January 12th... I can't wait!

It's official... Wyatt has a State Representative rallying for him! (I am doing the biggest happy dance you could imagine... Will you join me in celebrating?!)

A Special Thanks

I have just been a terrible person. I have received some beautiful gifts from people and it's taken me forever to actually sit dow, write a post, and thank everyone... I swear there just haven't been enough hours in the day!

Getting Eli potty trained wouldn't have anything to do with my lack of time to blog...

Nor would my insane schedule with recent photo shoots...

Or even the Marine Corps. Ball...

Or Birthday parties...

Or "Spring" Cleaning...

Anyways, I'm here now. I will apologize ahead of time for the length of this post. I have quite a few things to write about :)

First of all, I want to thank Holly for the beautiful fall picture I received in my inbox last week. I LOVE seeing Wyatt's name written in the world. It makes me feel like a part of him is still here.

Also, thanks to Rikki for taking the time to write Wyatt's name while on a walk in the fernery. I thought it was sweet that she said she felt like it was the perfect place to take a picture of Wyatt's name because the fernery was dedicated to all good moms. Thanks you so much for thinking about Wyatt.

I also received a picture from Jennifer ages ago and just never posted about it. Sorry Jennifer! I would have never thought to do this, but she wrote Wyatt's name in flour. It looked really neat with the dark background for contrast.

I will cherish each of these pictures for the rest of my life. It means so much to have someone think about Wyatt without me having to bring him up. It truly means the world to me!

And you know what? I have a couple of sneaky Wednesdays for Wyatt winners! Apparently Jennifer from The Blue Sparrow, and April from Our Broken Hearts got my address from the packages I sent them... Anyways, I was completely surprised when I received these beautiful gifts in the mail.

From Jennifer I received this gorgeous frame with a "W" etched in the glass, as well as a picture frame I will use to put a black and white picture of Wyatt in:

And from April I got this hand painted Christmas ornament of Wyatt for my Christmas tree this year:

I wasn't wanting to put up a tree this year, but I have to now because I can't wait to see these ornaments adorn our tree this Christmas season! Thanks girls...

From Celia I received this sweet reunion heart with a very touching poem. We talk quite frequently but she sealed her lips that she was sending this to me and I was pleasantly surprised when Joseph brought the mail in. Here is a picture of the stone and the poem that follows (sorry I couldn't get the heart picture any larger):

Since Heaven has become your home

I sometimes feel I'm so alone;

and though we now are far apart

you hold a big piece of my heart

I never knew how much I'd grieve

when it was time for you to leave,

or just how much my heart would ache

from that one fragment you would take

God lets this tender hole remain

reminding me we'll meet again,

and one day all the pain will cease

when He restores this missing piece.

He'll turn to joy my every tear

with thoughts of you I hold so dear,

and they'll become my special way

to treasure our Reunion Day.

Last, but not least, I ordered a couple of custom statues from The Midnight Orange and I just received them today. They scream Wyatt to me and I am beyond happy with the way they turned out.

The elephant with the "Angel Wyatt" riding it, I had made for myself...

And the star statue I had done for Joseph as a gift from Wyatt for Christmas. I just know he will love it because stars hold special meaning to him.

Thank you again to all who thought of Wyatt! And thank you to everyone who offer prayers for our family... we can feel our family being lifted in love and prayers every single day.